new blog address

so I decide to create a new blog because the url for this one is fickyypregnancy and was suppose to be just about my pregnancy journey, obviously I am no longer pregnant and most likely( unless my husband has 180 change of heart) Audrey is my one and only. so here is my new blog and you should follow it. New Blog

Life is too short

The last few days have been sad, no tragedy in my life but in friends lives. One of my good friends lost her mother after she was severely burned in a gas explosion. I feel awful being so far away and not being able to be there to support her, I know how hard losing a parent is and its never easy no matter how old you are. A friend I've come to know through a Stay at home mom board I'm on passed away yesterday, she was so young and had just given birth to her third son at the begining of April, and now her boys have lost a wonderful mother and so many people have lost a good friend, my heart breaks for her family. It does not seem fair that awful people with no purpose in life get to live and someone life her is taken away too soon. The one bright spot was Carter B turned 2! Audrey and I sent him a video singing Happy Birthday, wish we could've been there in person. Hug your loved ones, Life is too short and you never know if you'll have tomorrow with them.

Ready or Not: Here Comes Summer!

Two weeks from tomorrow Ethan and Kayley will be here! I've got to get the house in order, since I spent Justins last hitch at his grandmas with a broken ankle and I can finally move around pretty good, it has been such a hassel:( anyway, got lots of things planned for this summer like going to the Zoo Science Museum, Cowboy Musem ,Botanical Garden and Six Flags. Audrey got a little pool from my mom, so we'll get Ethan and Kayley a small pool too and they'll have lots of fun in the backyard. We haven't seen them in 10 months so we are so excited! Audrey will love having someone to play with. Thanks to Pinterest.com I've got lots of crafts and stuff for them to do as well! We're kicking off the start of summer with the kids birthday party the 27th (their birthday is the 18th but we won't get them til the 24th)we're having a BBQ with family to celebrate. So fingers crossed its a great summer for our family of 5:)

Oh what a move & Easter

So Justin and I got all moved in our new place, next time we move we are hiring movers though, Justin moved everything by himself except the crib and what wouldn't fit on the dolley, ugh! ANYWAY.. I love our new place, so much space! more cabinets than I know what to do with, lots of room, and a backyard with a tall privacy fence. I plan on getting a little pool for HEthan and Kayley to use this summer and a little baby pool for Audrey. We got brand new couches, and I love them they go great in our long living room with hard wood floors. We still need to get a dinning room table though. I'm liking our area of Fort Worth, thank goodness for GPS though, or I would never find anything lol. Audrey had a good Easter, it was the first holiday Justin has been home to celebrate with us since she was born so that was really nice. Next year I will have to get her a bigger basket, I used last years and it barely fit everything! here are some of Audreys Easter photos I did, and then some of Easter morning

Gas Out? No thanks.

If you are one of the idiots pushing the Gas Out on April 15th.... Learn some facts first 1. Not getting gas one day a year does nothing to hurt profit.
2. you are not hurting the oil company, you are hurting the bussiness man who owns the gas station who has no control over prices
3. if you don't like gas prices, don't own a car, walk to work or take the bus.
4. The "big bad oil man" is simply meeting supply and demand, if we didn't use so much we wouldn't be so short on supply, therefore prices wouldn't be so high.

5. and I don't know how many times I can explain that we use oil for SOOOOO much more than gasoline, and most "oil" companys also drill for natural gas, which heats your homes, lets you cook, ect. If you really want to "hurt the Oil Man" then stop using all these products. The sign you made to protest, you made it using products made out of oil, EX: crayons,Ink, Paint Brushes.. The roads you drive your gas hogging cars, or electric cars on.. made from oil.

Everyone wants to complain while they sit in their warm houses and drive their cars.. how about instead of complaining and bitching, and hating the oil man you say " hey thanks for working your ass off 12 hours a day to get that stuff out of the ground, and being away from your family for weeks sometimes months at a time, so that I can have all this stuff."
here is a SMALL list of products made using oil.

"And making the products listed below consumes more than 1 million barrels of oil per day, according to Energy Information Administration estimates."
Ammonia
Antifreeze
Antiseptics
Art supplies
Artificial limbs
Aspirin
Astroturf
Awnings
Bandages
Cleaning products
Candles
Carpets
Caulking
Clothing
Crayons
Creams
Cosmetics
Cutlery
Dentures
Dice
Dyes
Electronics
Film
Fishing line
Floor wax
Foam
Glasses
Glue
Glycerin
Guitar strings
Heart valves
Helmets
Ink
Insulation
Lubricants
Medicine
Nail polish
Nylon
Paint
Paint brushes
Panty hose
Petroleum jelly
Plastics
Records
Refrigerant
Roofing
Shampoo
Shaving cream
Shoes
Shower curtains
Skis
Soap
Solvents
Sports equipment
Tires
Toys
Trash bags
Umbrellas
Upholstery
Vitamin capsules

15 yr old self

The past few days I've been reading my old web blog site I had when I first started highschool, in 2003. Xanga It's pretty entertaining to read the things I wrote, the stupid drama and all the day to day things I worried about at 15, like boys and class and my friends. I wrote about never getting married, and being an actress or writer or photographer who traveled the world taking photos for some cheap magazine. It's made realize how little a 15 yr old knows, believe me at the time I really did think I knew everything and I was so "mature and wise" for my age.. It makes me laugh to think of Audrey at 15, if she'll be like I was . I wrote in one post "i know what i wanna do with my life, act. take pictures and raise a family with prince charming on some coast shore in the north west like oregon" Well I did get Prince Charming and a family ! Although I must say, I did have good taste in music which has reminded me of some old bands I'd forgotten about. this is some lyrics I had posted and they really fit for my life as it is now. All through the night I'll be watching over you And all through the night I'll be standing over you And through bad dreams I'll be right there baby telling you everything's going to be alright When you cry I'll be there baby telling you were never nothing less than beautiful So don't you worry I'm your Angel standing by 9 years ago I never would have imagined my life as it is today, living in a big city, being a stay at home mom to a goofy little girl and married to a man who's only home half the time AND never ever would have I seen myself being a stepmother to two kids. Even this time 4 years ago, right before I met Justin I never would have guessed this was how my life would turn out. It's amazing how you change so much over time, from your teenage years to your 20s.

World Down Syndrome Day

As I've written before I have a friend, I consider her a friend even though we've never met and she lives in Florida while I live in Texas, we went through our pregnancy together her daughter Kennedy was born 9 days before Audrey. Kennedy was born with Down Syndrome, my heart broke for my friend, but then I saw how she came through it, and I've watched Kennedy, through her mothers posts and blogs, grow into this amazing little girl, I no longer see Kennedy as DS baby, I just see her as Kennedy. Her mother is such an inspiration! Prior to Kennedy I only knew two people with DS, both were in an ex boyfriends family, I didn't really understand it, I just knew they were different and I once used the word "retarded" about a shirt I was wearing and my ex flipped out, I didn't understand why he was so mad and I really thought he was over reacting. But now I get it, I get why that word is so offensive. I've been trying to stop using that word, and when it does slip out I instantly feel bad because that's such an ugly word, and I really encourage everyone to STOP using that word. Today is World Down Syndrome Day, If you know nothing about DS then I encourage you to learn something, check out my friends blog, read her amazing journey over the last year. http://www.worlddownsyndromeday.org/

http://lifeasweknowit-jenniferm.blogspot.com/

Moving on up!

So we got a house in Ft.Worth, just renting for now until we fix 3 things on Justins credit then we can buy next year. I'm excited to have a yard to let the kids play outside, and to have a bigger place 3 bedrooms and two bathrooms, lots of space for the kids! It's about 20 minutes from where we are now and about 150$ more in rent than what we pay now, but we looked and looked around our Arlington and it's just more expensive to live here, a duplex was 1250$! I've been busy packing, which is helping this hitch go by faster, I've got my dishes, my books, wall decor, and movies all packed. I took a lot of stuff to goodwill, including Audreys swing and bouncer, and sold her exersaucer and infant car seat.. I was more sad than I thought I would be, because It means she really isn't a "baby" anymore. Justin goes back to work right after we move in so I get to unpack all by myself, but everytime we've ever moved that's how its been so I guess I'm used to it.

mother of a toddler now!

Audrey turned 1 Feb 28th. It does NOT seem like she should be a toddler, that she should be walking and starting to try to talk. The past year went by at warped speed it seems like. Her birthday was bittersweet, I was happy to celebrate her birth, the amazing little person she is, but I was sad that she was growing up. I never understood why mothers were sad about their kids birthdays, but I totally get it now. I want her to stay my little baby forever. We had her birthday at Justin's aunts house, not many people came, which kinda sucked, but oh well. She got a lot of toys and clothes, she has so many toys now she needs another toy box! My mom got her a play kitchen, she loves it, and it grows as she gets bigger, we got her a push car and a Dora chair, she loves it and sits in like she's a big girl watching cartoons. Her hair is so long now I can pull it back in a little pony tail. She has grown and changed so much in a year, this time last year she was this tiny little helpless baby and now she's more in charge than I am sometimes! haha! She is a walking mess maker, she leaves a trail of destruction everywhere she goes! She has changed my life in so many ways, I used to be a pretty selfish person, but when you're a mother you would walk to the moon and back for your child, at least I would. I'm so lucky to have this little goofy girl as my daughter. I love her so much! The fun things start now, everyday is something new with her, she recently started giving kisses, I never knew my heart could melt so fast! It is the sweetest thing ever! I made it through the infant stage, I sometimes didn't know if I would make it through the day, it was hard doing it on my own most of the time, but I did it, and now I get to see her explore and grow in new ways, like talking and playing. I'm sad to see my little baby grow but I'm excited for this new stage of life, being the mother of a toddler. But no matter what she will ALWAYS be my baby, even when she's 40.

The only way out is through

I Love this Tat. I've been wanting to get these lyrics (by Alanis Morissette) for awhile, and I think I want them just like this... but on my wrist so I can see them, it's going to be my reward to myself when I reach my goal, to remind me that I can come through anything, that I am strong. Love it. Workouts are kicking my butt, my legs are super sore, but I lost another pound! And even though my husband has already eaten out twice since he's been home I have resisted and stuck to my plan.

10lbs down

I've lost 10 lbs so far! which is pretty good for less than two weeks!
the first few days were rough, I was still so hungry between meals, I was literally watching the clock until I could eat again.
now Its no big deal.
I wasn't able to drink the green tea, I guess I just dislike all tea, so its been just water for me!
I'm excited to start Phase 1 on Tuesday, I can have a regular breakfast like fiber cereal or oatmeal instead of the shake, and I can have fruit with my meals or as a snack. I'm nervous about the workouts, I've heard they are pretty hard and since my workout level and experience is at like a -10 this is probably going to kick my ass.
Also I know there are a few positions and exercises I won't be able to do because I can't fully extend my left arm or put a lot of weight on it because my elbow never healed right.
But I'm going to give it my all!
I already feel like I have more energy, I started going for walks at the park with Audrey, I'm hoping it warms up soon so I can go everyday.

Day 5

I'm on day 5 of my Reset part of the P.I.N.K. Method
I don't have much energy the last two days, I guess its my body adjusting to the diet change but so far I've lost 6 lbs!
I slacked yesterday and had bread with my turkey burger patty, which is probably why I didn't lose any, still weigh the same as yesterday.
I haven't hadn't anything to drink other than water since starting this, which is HUGE for me, I stopped drinking caffeine when I was pregnant but I drank a lot of juice.
I can't wait to be done with the reset part and start the workouts .
I'm determined to do this.
My first goal weight is 170 and then 150.
I've never been a "small" girl, ever, even when I was a kid I had big bones and big hips so I'm not going to set an unrealistic goal of getting down to a size 6.
I want to be in shape and healthy and feel confident about the way I look, I don't care if society will still label me as "fat". I'm doing this for ME, no one else. okay well I'm doing it also for Audrey, I want to be healthy so I'm around a LONG LONG time for her.

Reset Day 1

SO I started the P.I.N.K Method today.
I had a protein shake this morning, included whey protein, strawberries and almond milk. For lunch had a bowl of lettuce with tuna and tomato with a small serving of non fat ranch, and a glass of water.
This is going to be a lifestyle change for me, and its going to be hard!
I HATE water, I had to force myself to drink it during my pregnancy, and I know I never drank enough, I'm going to attempt to drink Green Tea, so we'll see! No cokes, no coffee, no juice.. that part kind of sucks, but Oh well, I'll have to get used to it!
I don't start the workouts until I'm done with the "Reset" part which , for me, will last 2 weeks.
I'm already hungry but that's because I'm used to eating large portions and snacking whenever I want, one of the downfalls of being a SAHM,you have access to the kitchen all day, everyday.
I can have a snack of veggies or yogurt, but I'm going to wait another hr, so it gets me through until dinner, which will be 4 oz of fish and a small salad with tomato.

2012

So I'm 8 days late, but oh well!
2011 was an AMAZING year, I had Audrey, I became a SAHM, I got Married.. it was the best year of my life.
This time last year, time dragged on as I waited for my due date, I couldn't wait to meet the little baby girl in my tummy.. and now that sweet baby is going to be 1 soon! I can't believe it! She has such a little personality, she is goofy and such a happy girl. She loves to play with her toys, and is always trying to get into something.
I feel so blessed to be her mother, the best job of my life.
I also FINALLY married my soul mate, even though sometimes in our relationship I thought he'd never make me an honest woman haha! Not much has really changed in our relationship since becoming Husband and Wife, except that my name has changed and we have more rights.
All in all 2011 was awesome.

For 2012 I have one plan.
Lose weight! I know a lot of people make this their resolution, and I've said it before but this year its serious.
I want to be healthy, I want to be able to run and play with Audrey, I want to have energy and not feel sick and tired all the time. I want to feel attractive when I get dressed up.
I've ordered the P.I.N.K Method, and I've started counting calories.. my goal is 100lbs off by June 2013.